I never complain about my wife. Well, maybe once in a while...
But, I always laugh about the guy who is married 20 years and doesn't stop bitching about his wife or the wife who cant stand her husband
Or, the employee who has worked for a company for 12 years and talks about how bad his boss or company is.
My question always isn't about the person my friend is bitching about. More so than anything else, I wonder what about my friend. And when you complain, what does that say about you? Why be in that bad relationship, domestic, work or otherwise for that long if it means being miserable?
I get it--sometimes you are dealt a bad hand and things get more than rocky. And, it's hard to see that coming. But, so many people I know are so unhappy for such long periods of time with the important things in their life and it has to stop!
Here's what you need to do: take out two pieces of paper--not the Notes app in your iPhone, but two pieces of blank paper--and write down all the things that you want to do and then all the things stopping you from doing it.
Usually your unhappiness with another person or your job is the unhappiness you have with yourself. So, next time your friend is bitching about their significant other or job for any extended period of time tell them to stop for a second and go back in time to think about why they got together with that person or why they took that job. Have them talk about all the details they liked and loved.
Suddenly, it may seem a whole lot easier to get up for work in the morning and to go home at night.
There's an old story about a guy that went to live with a monk to see what it was like. He cut off all his hair and was in the middle of town asking for money. He decides he wants to go for a run in the woods with the other monks. (Remember, they're barefoot). He starts complaining to the other monks, "Hey my foot is starting to hurt."
And their response was: "Concentrate on the other foot."
Focus on the positive more than the negative and you will be much happier.
Since today is Labor Day and most of you probably have off from work as you are reading this, I challenge you to take two sheets of paper and actually do a little assessment about something you are unhappy with in your life. You will be surprised with the results.